Is Withholding Sex A Legitimate Grounds For Divorce?
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What if your wife withholds sex whenever she gets PO’d about something, which is often? How long should a man have to put up with that before it becomes abuse and files for divorce?
I moved on after 2 years of abuse.
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The big problem is that all wives do withhold it eventually.
If you want sex don’t get married. Marriage kills it. IMHO.
emotional abuse fo sho
I’d say that you have the patience of a saint. I’m glad that you were able to get away from that abusive partner.
I can’t remember what its called " _____ of affections" or something like that…dang it ,…..its on the tip of my tongue.
Yes, a legal grounds.
Yes. Withholding sex is childish and immature.
If she was unwilling to grow up and act like an adult, I can’t say as I blame you.
This isn’t about the sex part of it, it’s about the control. She was using sex (which I believe is sacred between a husband and wife) to get her way, make a point and punish you.
Its really hard to get all kissy huggy with somebody who calls you names or just does their best to annoy you. I’m sure she wasn’t in the mood! You create the mood and its not a problem.
well it is never considered "abuse". but if she with holds sex for months at a time (as is doing for no other reason than as a punishment) and still expects you to remain faithful, that is grounds for divorce. if she is with holding sex because you "pissed her off" by making her feel bad about her appearance in some way (ie; calling her fat or needlessly pointing out flaws about her body)- it may be due to just feeling unsexy.
In North Carolina this is a legitimate reason to get a divorce (it is called alienation of affection)
Yes it is, if shes withholding sex and a means of control and or abuse of power its likely she is using a plethora of other emotional and psychological bully tactics too.
You need to read up on the definitions and tactics these people use so you can identify and articulate them all. Keep a diary.
YES it is grounds for divorce.
Sex is what separates a "romantic relationship" from a "friendship". When you get married you are getting married on the grounds that you are life long sexual partners.
Therefore, withholding sex is no different than withholding love, attention, support, money, etc.
If it is done for "control" it is abuse.
Yeah if it’s deliberately withholding sex that could really lead to the breakdown of a relationship and if that’s happened divorce is the best bet.
Of course some people might just not feel in the mood when they’re angry with their partner, so they’re not really childishly withholding, but just exercising their right to say no at that time.
I would be pretty pissed off if I had a partner who tried to manipulate me that way.
And I don’t think divorce needs a "legitimate ground", people should be able to get divorced whenever they choose. Most places have no-fault divorce anyway.
Harriet
If your wife dies, you can get award damages for loss of consortium, which includes sexual intercourse. I don’t see why it wouldn’t be legitimate grounds for divorce, especially as most places are no fault, so you don’t need a reason.
i do not feel a relationship should be based only on sex but it is a MUST. if this goes on all the time then there are serious problems and you guys are just not connecting. If its not there emotionally either then i dont think it can be there sexually/physically.
If one didn’t let it get to that stage in the first place, there wouldn’t be any "withholding" at all. Prevention is way better than a cure. I find it astonishing that so many men just. don’t.get.it.
Contrary to what one reads in GWS, most women actually enjoy sex. But, a little work is necessarily to keep the love alive. Those who have an active sex life generally do so because the relationship is running smoothly, which in turn brings closeness to the couple, which in turn leads to sex, which leads as back to a smooth running relationship, and then back to sex.
When one harasses their partner for sex however, and it becomes a loaded issue, *anyone* on the receiving end of that, begins to feel pressured. This pressure quickly morphs into resentment. Throw a few fights into the scenario, and it’s unlikely that one’s partner will actually *want* to have sex at all.
My advice to men who just don’t "get it" is be nice to her. Say nice things. Put some effort into the relationship, and you’ll quickly find that she’ll be happier and you’ll be happier because she’s now initiating sex.
Works a charm
If however, you have both failed to keep the love alive, the fact that you don’t have sex is probably indicative of the lack of work mentioned above. In that case, without love (and therefore sex) that should be good enough reason to file for divorce. A loveless marriage is never much fun.
It is not abuse and not grounds for divorce.
A woman has to be happy with her partner in order to want sex.
You may find yourself in the same situation again if you will not look in the mirror.
No, rather then divorcing, the couple should talk to a professional about it, and try to solve the problem.
Anyway marriage is not just about sex, its about love, and if you really love someone, then sex wouldn’t matter.
While its immature, and disrespectful it is NOT abuse of any kind, nor is it cruel and inhuman treatment (some states allow this for grounds as well).
Some states do allow withholding affection as grounds for divorce, If your state does not allow it as grounds, then you can most likely file for irreconcilable differences, or breakdown of the marriage, etc. (http://document-do-it-yourself-service.com/divorce_laws/state_divorce_laws.html)
Legally it is.
It goes against the legal definition of marriage which states the goal of marriage as physical intimacy, not reproduction.
Being sterile is not a ground, but frigidity or impotency is.
If you piss someone off, they’re not always going to be in the mood for sex. We don’t know what you’re saying to make her pissed off, but if she’s doing it just to see you suffer..it’s abuse.
If you want sex, be nice to her, make her feel hot…get the mood right. Women have to be turned on by the person to want it from them. Calling someone a "fat ugly b*tch" isn’t going to arouse her.
If she still isn’t giving you sex or has no interest in doing it with you, move on then.
I think it is emotionally abusive to constantly withhold sex, unless it is for some medical reason. I would think it would become terribly frustrating. Couples should accomodate each other’s sexual needs as much as possible, and if one partner in the marriage isn’t interested in doing that, then it seems that there must be a great lack of affection there anyway.
–Divorce maybe – I say it’s grounds for you to find yourself a nice girl friend. Get what you need and enjoy it. Women who withholds man’ needs or only asking for their husbands to look somewhere else.
— Sometimes when you have kids it’s best to stay married, but you get what you need some where else. Those same woman don’t understand why a man goes find another honey somewhere else.
Yes it is legitimate grounds for divorce.
To be in a relationship where your need for intimacy is rejected by your spouse, or your need for closeness is neglected by the person that claims to love you or to be with someone that makes you feel alone is a horrible situation to be in. Sharing physical affection with your wife was important to you. When she said that it wasn’t important to her she was saying that you weren’t important to her or at least the things that are important to you has no importance to her. The only question is, why did you tolerate that kind of abuse for so long?
Actually yes it is. in getting married you both forsake all others. It therefore becomes your marital duty to take care of eachothers needs.